Cynicism and Roses

....for you to enjoy....

letter to panda
Dear Panda:

I don't really know how to tell you this, but I dislike you. I think I realized it when I changed tennis shoes in your camping car and I saw you sit on Manchester United's goalkeeper. I'm sure you're scarred enough to understand that your Honda sucks. I'm returning your love letters to you, but I'll keep your neighbour Martin as a memory. You should also know that I always have felt dirty before the incarnation as an eskimo.

In pain,

Do the "Letter MEME". Tag no less than 5 other people, and leave them a comment, informing them that they have been tagged. Then copy the "How-to" Letter Meme, and finish your Journal entry.

meme under here!Collapse )

youtube movies...
so, i randomly looked at the number of faves i have on my youtube account...and i have faved 283 movies...and probably more in my playlists...

that's just astounding to me...

alot of those faves are full length movies that i've looked up because i am the biggest cheapskate on the planet and also the, heres we go...i am gonna catalog all the full length movies i have, for the benefit of myself as well as other who might find it useful...

i love youtube sometimes...^_______^

if you have found any other full length movies on youtube, please share with me and i'll add it to my list! this is for everyone! ^________^ i hope you guys found this useful.


Robert Downey Jr Films

---Natural Born Killers---

---Only You---

---Charlie Bartlett---

---The Shaggy Dog---

---Kiss Kiss Bang Bang---

---Tuff Turf---



YouTube finds and deletes these full movies periodically, and/or the users who post them get paranoid and remove them...unfortunately, Less Than Zero has since been removed and I can't find another submission of it...sorry darlings! =(

Disney Movies ^_________^

---Toy Story---

---Alice in Wonderland---

---Lady and the Tramp---

---Robin Hood---

---The Fox and the Hound---

---The Black Cauldron---

---The Great Mouse Detective---

---Oliver and Co.---

---The Little Mermaid---

---The Rescuers Down Under---

---Beauty and the Beast---

---A Muppet Christmas Carol---


---A Goofy Movie---


---The Hunchback of Notre Dame---

---Muppet Treasure Island---

---101 Dalmations---



---A Bug's Life---


---The Emperor's New Groove---

---Monsters Inc.---

---Atlantis: The Lost Empire---

---Treasure Planet---

---Brother Bear---

---The Shaggy Dog---

Superhero Movies


---Superman Returns---

---Batman Begins---

---Batman (1989)---

Batman Returns was another full movie that was removed (sadly)...

Random Other Fav Movies

---My Own Private Idaho---

---The Nightmare Before Christmas---

---The Corpse Bride---

---The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy---

---Sin City---

---The Lord of the Rings: The Fellowship of the Rings---

---The Lord of the Rings: The Two Towers---

---The Lord of the Rings: The Return of the King---

---Ed Wood---

---Requiem for a Dream---

---Office Space---

---I, Robot---

---Son in Law---


fucked up mood...
so, i'm in a weird mood right now...

my doctor called and said that there was a mix up with the test results and no, i do not have cervical cancer...that utter bullshit aside, i'm still having to go to appointments to see what the hell is wrong with me...

but, i'm getting a new doctor very...very soon......seriously...

i feel like a horrible person right now because i haven't called and talked to my mom in four days...a horrible i'm quite sad about that...

my sister came to my apartment earlier and was bitching and yelling at me, so i kicked her out...i'm still pretty fuckin' pissed off about that...

buuuuuuut, i've been watching some gnarley Metalocalypse videos online, which make me giggle and laugh and just generally put me in a good mood...

or would...

so, i'm pissed, i'm sad, but then again i'm, what the fuck is that??? a weird mood, that's what...a weird, touchy, emotional mood...

i've come to the conclusion that i'm pretty fucked up...yup...


daft punk - around the world
this video makes me happy...^______^

(no subject)
my roommates are really goddamn annoying...i don't think the amount that they annoy me really struck me until right now...

there is a sign on my door that reads "I'm sleeping! Please be quiet!"...and yet, they are slamming doors and giggling and running around and making all kindsa fucking racket...and come to think of it, i never realized how annoying giggling was until just now...

i believe the only things we have in common are our place of residence and the fact that we're all gay...which, for some odd reason, is really annoying in's like they put all the dikes together in one apartment so that they could keep us confined to each other...

do i tell them to shut the fuck up, quit making so much goddamn racket because i'm trying to sleep? to i wait til 2am when they're asleep and make my own racket just to spite them? do i silently seethe about it and do nothing (which will eventually lead to me overloading and killing someone)????????

jesus h christ...they are annoying...

*le sigh*

my tummy hurts...=(


(no subject)
it is officially the end of the second to worst day of my life...

but iono by what lucky chance i found this vid on youtube, but i did, and i swear to god, instead of tears of misery and pain and hopelessness, i have been crying tears of fucking joy from laughing so goddamn hard...

this is the best vid ever made in existance...

play the vid and prepare to lose your mind...


(no subject)
three things happened this week...

1) i found out i have cervical cancer...
2) my cousin was in a severely debilitating accident...
3) i was fired from my job...

i'm not coping well with this, mostly because i was fired because of numbers one and two...i missed work three days in a row due to them...i called and i called and i was hung up on by the goddamn operator each time, but apparently i should have kept calling and trying to contact them despite the circumstances and since i didn't i was a "no call, no show" which is job abandonment...even though i tried and got hung up's my fault...or so i'm told...

so, i basically have been fired because of a family tragedy and because i found out i have cancer...

i am pissed off and devastated and shot down and i'm not fucking dealing with this well at all...i literally have tears in my eyes and my hands are shaking as i type this, but i need to get it out...i was fired maybe thirty minutes ago and i feel like i'm just gonna explode...

fucking fucking fucking fucking fuck...



i am so not dealing with all this shit...


fuck halloween...
fuck halloween...i'm ready for christmahannakwanzaa...these are my favorite christmas songs!!!! click the pop-up-player for my playlist to come up...

computer coma
well, i downloaded a couple of movies recently (and by a couple, i mean ten) and my C-drive was freaking out on my, i bought a bunch of cd's the other day to burn said movies and get them off my C-drive...7/10 fit onto the cd's, which is i delete them off my laptop...and now, every fucking time i put the cd with Kiss Kiss Bang Bang on it into my computer to play, my entire laptop decides to go into a coma and, i can't even move the mouse, and i can't turn the computer off because it still has all i can do is wait for it to run out of power and restart it...

lame...fucking lame...and now i'm really pissed because i deleted Kiss Kiss Bang Bang off my computer...

and moreover, i'm pissed because while my computer is sitting comatose waiting to die, i really wanna write the last fucking chapter of my Satan's Alley fic...

fucking lame...

also, my allergies are finally kicking my ass...i love living in central texas, but's a pain in the fucking ass...*le sigh*

i'm done being a drama queen...


what hurts the most...
mom, what hurts the most is that if i wanted to bring home the woman of my dreams, the woman that holds my hand, the woman that i am in love wouldn't let're giving me an ultimatum...accept her love and lose yours, or lose her love and accept is this fair? either way, i'm losing part of my heart...

now, i'm stuck in the middle...all alone in the middle...

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