mask_of_glamour


Cynicism and Roses

....for you to enjoy....


go forth and be merry
mask_of_glamour
How did you find this journal.

Keep moving.

Go away.

(no subject)
mask_of_glamour
tummy kinda queazy for some reason....=/

even looking at my brother sets my teeth on edge.....just talking about him with mom makes me angrier than FUCK.....>=(

my sister ran four miles today......now i feel even more like a fat fuck.......=___= *sigh*

about to take drastic measures on this weight shit......

work tomorrow.....=|......do not want to go......FUCK i don't wanna go.....the bullshit there is amazing......but goddamn am i broke.......*sigh*........i at least didn't hate going to work when i was at Starbucks.....now Hobby Lobby??? probably why my stomach is queazy.......

hmmmmph.......

what the fuck am i gonna do though.......

meh.......

listen to my music and just keep on doin' the shit.......

hmmmmph.......

Emily

(no subject)
mask_of_glamour
my sister-in-law is a fucking bitch ass cunt.......

that is all....

(furious) Emily

dream a little dream.....
mask_of_glamour
i suppose i'm hormonal or something.......every time i am, i get really really fucking emo about shit......

anyway, i'm in a poetic frame of mind.......

sitting here in the dark of my room, listening to a playlist of old songs from the 90s, i seem to dream a waking dream of times now gone, never to return.......

Nirvana in particular.....they seem to embody the 90s for me, and thusly my childhood.......my brother and sister are six and seven years older than me, and i listened to what they listened to, and I listened to Nirvana amongst other artists.........

the suffering voice of Kurt Cobain, strumming his suffering song on his guitar........the pain seeps through, seeps through my ears into my soul......

and if i close my eyes to this darkness around me, i can float away on his voice into the past.......the world has a golden glow, as if i am looking through a yellow lens filter........no weight on my shoulders........no pain in my heart......i am laying on my bed, the sun shining in through my windows, the trees swaying in the wind as it blows through my room, cooling my flesh and soul.............

my dad is happy and alive, and my mom is happy, and my brother and sister are happy.......and i...i am happy too, and content to just live and breathe.........

and then, i can open my eyes, and there is darkness all around me once more........my dad has died, Kurt Cobain has died, the past has died, and all i can do is sit here and dream about the times when the sun shone brightest.......

it may be over a hundred degrees here in Texas right now.......but the sun won't ever shine as bright as it did in the 90s when i was still a child with her father..........and sometimes, despite the heat, i get a cold feeling deep down inside........

can't do much about it........

Kurt Cobain can make me cry just listening to his voice, a memory of those days.........

just as he is a memory......

and i feel, even in my twenty four years of existence, i am a person with too many memories.......and yet, not enough.....not nearly enough.......

death, o death.....why must you linger around me like a cold winter wind, killing those i love?

bittersweet existence.....when you're surrounded by the ghosts of your loved ones and live to dream of the past.....can't go forward.......too painful.......

anyway......

Emily

(no subject)
mask_of_glamour
haven't written one of these in a long fuckin' time....years? i think so.....*shrugs*

life is still balls......

i feel like i'm going to fucking lose my job because of incompetency, but i know for a fact that i'm not incompetent......i feel like i'm getting used and mistreated by my work/boss, who damn well doesn't appreciate my hard work or the fact that i get compliments from my customers for my chipper attitude and effort.......fuck him......

and then i come home, and my brother is using my mom like nobody's business.......using her house, her utilities, her car, fucking around with said car without asking her first, using her refrigerator space, making her feel like shit and me feel like shit, like WE'RE the useless idiots when THEY are the ones who don't have a fucking job or a drop of income and are just mooching off their own mother.......

and my sister, who is only slightly better, dumping her kids off on mom even though she's bone tired and just wants to sleep and relax and have some own time for herself.......

i love my mom so much, and i can't believe that she's being used like this by her own kids......it makes me sick......

right now, i'm so stressed from work and life and fucking everything, i wish i could just close my eyes and drift away into the vastness of space.........get away from everything, and be surrounded by absolutely nothing, and just float........the stars are sparkling around me, the planets and moons are making lazy orbits around exploding suns, comets are whizzing past me leaving trails of sparkling light and dust and debris.........but there is no sound, no air, nothing to worry about or even feel...........

just floating......

as if.......

oh well.......

Emily

civil war reference for me...
mask_of_glamour
PRO-REGISTRATION
--Iron Man/Tony Stark
--Beast/Hank McCoy
--Bishop/Lucas Bishop
--Yellowjacket/Hank Pym (ex-wife:Janet Van Dyne) ***
--Dead Pool/Wade Wilson(Jack)
--Falcon/Sam Wilson
--Ares/John Aaron (son:Alexander, daughter:Harmonia)
--Black Widow/ Natalia [Natasha] Romanova
--Ms. Marvel/Carol Danvers
--Sentry/Robert Reynolds (wife:Lindy Reynolds)
--Wasp/Janet Van Dyne (ex-husband:Hank Pym)
--Wonder Man/Simon Williams
--Mr. Fantastic/Reed Richards
--War Machine/James Rhodes
--She Hulk/Jennifer Walters
--Maria Hill
--Thadeus Dugan/Dum Dum Dugan

ANTI-REGISTRATION
--Captain America/Steve Rogers
--Ant Man/Eric O'Grady ***
--Archangel/Warren Worthington III
--Black Panther/T'Challa
--Agent 13/Sharon Carter
--Dare Devil/Matt Murdock
--Nick Fury
--Human Torch/Johnny Storm
--Invisible Woman/Susan Storm
--The Thing/Ben Grimm
--Knightress/Jessica Jones (husband:Luke Cage [Hero for Hire])
--The Punisher/Frank Castle
--Quick Silver/Pietro Maximoff (sister:Wanda Maximoff [Scarlett Witch], father:Magnus [Magneto], wife:Crystal Maximoff, daughter:Luna Maximoff)
--Hero for Hire/Luke Cage (wife:Jessica Jones [Knightress])
--Doctor Strange/Stephen Strange
--Iron Fist/Danny Rand
--Ronin/Clint Barton
--Spider Man/Peter Parker (wife:Mary Jane Parker)
--Spider Woman/Jessica Drew
--Wolverine/James Howlett (Logan)
--Submariner/Namor McKenzie
--Winter Soldier/James Buchanan Barnes (Bucky)




*** I THOUGHT HANK PYM WAS KNOWN AS ANT MAN...i know he was known as Giant Man, but i also thought he was Ant Man because of his helmet which made it possible for him to communicate with ants...also, i've seen it in fics where he was Ant Man...*is totally confused**

i need to do more cannon research apparently...*le sigh*

Emily

i'm a demon too panda!!
mask_of_glamour
Which creature of the night are you?
Your Result: Demon
 

Your raging id needs no chemical incentive to break out into a fiery orgy of destruction. When you're not burning, you're brooding. All you need is someone to point the way out for you.

Ghost
 
Werewolf
 
Vampire
 
Cthulu Spawn
 
Incubus/Succubus
 
Sorceror
 
Which creature of the night are you?
Quiz Created on GoToQuiz

batman meets zoolander
mask_of_glamour
i have no words worthy of this...

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and once again, my roommates are taking no consideration to the fact that i have a growing migraine and they are screaming and giggling like banshees...

i'm going to annihilate them...

Emily

FList Meme
mask_of_glamour
Leave a comment and...

1. I'll respond with something random about you.
2. I'll tell you which song or movie you remind me of.
3. I'll pick a flavor of jello to eat with you.
4. I'll say something that only makes sense to you and me. (if possible. If not, I'll say something that only makes sense to me.)
5. I'll tell you my first most prominent memory of you .
6. I'll tell you what animal you remind me of.
7. I'll ask you something I've always wondered about you.
8. I'll tell you my favorite thing about you.
9. I'll tell you my least favorite thing about you (if I can think of something, honestly on LJ, it's hard for me to dislike someone)
10. If you play, you should really post this on yours

kkbb fic
mask_of_glamour
a link to the Kiss Kiss Bang Bang fic i posted over at kkissbbang ...i love that movie...<3

http://community.livejournal.com/kkissbbang/60060.html

also, it is my orgasmic dreams to drive this car...

Photobucket


Emily

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